Finding A New Way
by phoenix1800
Summary: Set during season 6, cause I like Spike and he's going to get a happy (if not difficult to come by) ending. B/S
1. Default Chapter

I don't own BtVS, Joss Whedon and Mutant Enemy do.  
  
This fic takes place during the end of Wrecked. What might have happened if Spike had realized what was happening and stopped instead of going with it. Completely AU, cause darn it all, I like Spike, and he's gonna get a happy ending.  
  
Leaving Sunnyhell  
  
As Buffy slammed him into the wall and kissed him, Spike had to regain his thought process. What the hell was going on? The way they were going...it wasn't right. He knew it. Damn it all, he wanted her, but she was just going to use him and dump him again, like she had done after she kissed him.  
  
Screw this, he thought, as he angrily shoved her off. "What the hell?", asked Buffy. He glared at her and said, "No more. I may love you, but I'm not your damn toy. You were right, this doesn't mean anything. You hate me, and as soon as we leave here you'll go back to pretending that I'm an evil thing. Well guess what? I'm leaving. I'm sick of this stupid town, your stupid friends-except for Glinda and the Bit-and most of all, I'm sick of you, you stupid, sodding, condescending bitch. I'm outta here". He stalked off.  
  
Buffy was hurt, but decided it would be for the best. He'll be back, even if he does leave, which I doubt. She left to go home.  
  
A couple days later Buffy came down the stairs to hear Willow and Dawn talking. "Do ya want to go to a movie, Dawnie?", asked Willow, who was feeling much better after her latest fix from Rack.  
  
Dawn shook her head and said, "Sorry, but Spike's picking me up tonight. We're going to his crypt. He said he wanted to talk to me about something, probably about how he saw me talking to a guy yesterday. I swear, he is so over-protective sometimes". She didn't admit it out loud, but she liked it. At least Spike still noticed her.  
  
Buffy heard this, but decided not to argue against it. Spike couldn't hurt Dawn, plus at least this way she wasn't home alone.  
  
That night Spike picked up Dawn on his motorcycle, which he had somehow kept after the night of Buffy's resurrection. He didn't say much, just drove her to the crypt and followed her inside. Dawn gasped. The crypt was completely bare. No candles, rugs, T.V., or refrigerator. There was only a pile of boxes and one small metal chest.  
  
"Spike? What's going on?", she asked. He sighed and said, "I'm leaving this sodding town, Bit. I can't be here anymore. I just need a change of scenery. And I wouldn't leave without telling you".  
  
Dawn looked up at him and said, "What did she do?". "Pardon?", said Spike. Dawn got angry. "What did Buffy do to you this time? She's the only one who could make you leave. So spill". Spike sighed and said, "Nothing Bit. I don't mean to patronize you, but you really wouldn't understand. But I wanted to show you something".  
  
He picked up the metal chest and brought it over. He fished around in his pocket and brought out a beautiful, tiny diamond key on a chain. Instead of ridges like a regular key, it simply had a blossom shaped front. The back fit into the small opening of the chest, and he lifted the lid, saying softly, "This was my mum's chest. I took it with me after she passed on. I keep my most important possessions in here".  
  
Dawn looked in the box and saw a few pictures, a couple sheets of paper with writing, a pair of glasses, a railroad spike, not bloody thankfully, a small velvet pouch, and a book.  
  
He explained. "This is essentially who I am, or was. The pictures are of me and my family, both my mortal one and my vampire one. I also have one of you and Joyce, and one of the Scoobies. Don't ask me about that, I don't understand it myself. The poems are ones I wrote as a mortal and as a vampire. The glasses were mine, and so was the railroad spike".  
  
He took two gorgeous rings out of the pouch. "This-it was my mum's wedding ring". It was a beautiful gold band with the words engraved, "Love is patient, love is kind".  
  
"This", he said, holding up the other ring, a silver band which had a blue stone in the center surrounded by diamonds, "Was my mum's favorite ring. She said it reminded her of my eyes". He was having difficulty keeping his emotions at bay.  
  
"The book is my diary. I've kept it ever since I was a mortal. I didn't write much, but when I did I wrote a lot". The book was extremely thick. He put everything back in the chest and shut it. He motioned for Dawn to turn around, and when she did, he fastened the chain of the key around her neck.  
  
When she turned back around, she waited patiently for an explanation. "I was trying to think of something I could give to you. Something that would show you how much I'll miss you. You're like my lil' sis. Now see, you're a lot like this key, the way I see it. You open a really important thing, but you're beautiful all on your own, without having to open something. I don't see you as the Slayer's lil' sis, or the Key that opens a portal. You will grow up to be a gorgeous young woman, believe me. And I will be back to this stupid town one day. It's my home. And I won't open that chest until you're there to hand me the key, and hopefully I'll have something else to add to it. So don't think of it as goodbye forever, just goodbye for awhile".  
  
Dawn couldn't stop herself from giving Spike a big hug. She felt the tears rolling down her cheeks. Spike leaned back and saw this. "Bloody hell! I didn't mean to make you cry, Bit". She smiled and thwacked him on the arm. "It's sweet, that you thought of me. I wish you weren't going. But I can't stop you. And I know that you'll be back eventually". She let him get up, and helped him with the last of his boxes.  
  
She stood on the porch after he dropped her off and watched him walk away. She fingered the key and smiled to herself. Her big brother, at least in her eyes, was going away. But he wouldn't be away forever. 


	2. Journey

I don't own BtVS, Joss Whedon and Mutant Enemy do.  
  
Journey  
  
It had been a week since Spike had left. He made his way down to New Orleans. He was having a great time. He had needed it, the chance to get away from Buffy and whatever it was that they had.  
  
He was now in a bar, the name of which he didn't have. He was still killing demons, but only when he needed a violence fix. This bar was full of them. It was only slightly higher on the moral scale than Willie's. He decided to leave. Getting drunk in a town where he was a foreigner really wasn't at the top of his list.  
  
He had only gone a couple of blocks away when he heard the sounds of fighting. He turned the corner and saw a vamp being beat up by a girl. Unfortunately, there were more behind her. He got into game face and attacked the vamps behind her.  
  
The girl was doing well on her own, so he quickly took down the remaining vamps and watched as she dusted the first one expertly. Before he could say anything; however, he heard a voice in his mind. Duck!. He ducked, and the girl thrust a stake over his head and into the heart of the vampire that had been sneaking up behind him.  
  
"Thanks", the girl said, as she gave him a hand up. Spike looked at her. Deep green eyes, long brown hair. About the Slayer's age, give or take a few years.  
  
He said, "Uh, vampire here, luv. Why aren't you running?". The girl smiled and said, "You just helped me dust those other vamps, for one thing. Plus, I can tell that you aren't going to hurt me".  
  
Spike didn't question it. He could feel something powerful about this girl. "So what were you doing attacking vampires?", he asked, shaking out of his game face.  
  
She answered easily, "They attacked me, thank you very much. And having lived in this town, where there are demons around every corner, a girl has gotta learn some self defense.".  
  
Spike liked this girl. Not only was she not afraid of him, she was talking back to him. He stuck his hand out. "The name's Spike. What's yours?". She took his outstretched hand and said, "My name's Katrina, but everyone calls me Kat. Pleasure to meet you, Spike".  
  
They talked amicably for a few minutes, until Kat said suddenly, "Do you have a place to stay while you're here? I have an extra room at my place, you can crash there for awhile. It'll be nice to have some company. Plus, the bedroom you'd have has no windows, so no dust in the morning ".  
  
Spike thought about it. He had been staying in a pathetic rathole in the bad side of town. "Thanks, pet", he said. "Think I'll do that". She led him there, as they continued talking. --------------------------------------------- Buffy was tired when she got home. She hadn't seen Dawn in what seemed like forever. Without Spike backing her up, patrol was longer and harder. Willow had been out a lot more with Amy lately, so Dawn was often left home alone, which really bothered Buffy.  
  
She walked in to see Dawn holding something between her fingers. "What's that?", she asked as she plopped down on the couch. Dawn glared at her and said, "It's nothing". Buffy, confused by her reaction, said, "Dawn...", using the perfect motherly tone.  
  
Dawn relented and showed her the key. "Dawn, where did you get this?', asked Buffy. Her sister certainly couldn't have afforded this on her own.  
  
Dawn said, "Spike gave it to me". Buffy gaped, then shook her head and said, "Dawn, it isn't right, even if he gave it to you. He probably stole it, and-".  
  
Dawn got angry. "Buffy, this was his mother's! Do you really think he would give something he stole to me?"  
  
She shook her head and said bitterly, "Of course you would. After all, you did chase him out of town, I guess anything's possible".  
  
Buffy stared and said, "W-What?". Dawn smiled maliciously and said, "Oh, that's right, he didn't tell you. Well congratulations Buffy, you finally got Spike to leave, after three years. He left a week ago, but of course you were too busy to notice. He gave me the key that night we went out. Then he left". She stalked upstairs and slammed the door.  
  
Buffy's mind shut down. Spike left. Spike left Sunnydale. Spike left her. She slowly went up to her room and let the tears fall, wondering why the hell this bothered her so much. ------------------------------------------- If he'd been having fun before, Spike was having the best time of his unlife right now. Kat knew all the places to party and it seemed like she knew everyone in town. Right now they were just relaxing at her house, deciding to stay in for a night.  
  
"So", Kat said, "Tell me about the girl". Spike sat up straight. "What?", he asked. Kat rolled her eyes and said, "The girl. I can tell there's a girl getting you all mopey and depressed".  
  
Spike thought about it. He knew he could trust her. They were like best friends now. Oh, what the hell. He began to tell her his story.  
  
"So she starts kissing me, and I realized that she would never see me as more than a thing, so I ended it, said goodbye to my Bit and left. And here I am", he finished.  
  
Kay stared open-mouthed at him. "Wow. And I thought my life was hectic". Spike asked her, "What's your story, pet? You don't seem to have anyone keeping you around here".  
  
"I'm a psychic", she answered simply. "Found out when I was 14 and a demon killed my family to get to me. I lived by myself for a few years, then I drifted around. The only reason I like it here is because there are plenty of demons to kill".  
  
Spike said, "Your story's a lot shorter than mine". Kat smirked and replied, "Well, yeah, I haven't been around for 120-plus years, Grandpa". Spike looked at her and said indignantly, "Hey! I'm right good-looking for my age, and I was turned when I was 27, thank you very much. Belligerent little chit. Have some respect".  
  
Kat looked at him and burst out laughing. Spike couldn't help himself and joined in. "Bloody hell, I was channeling the Watcher for a second!", gasped Spike.  
  
When they finally stopped laughing, Kat said, "So what exactly is the problem with this Buffy? From what I've seen, you have a great sense of humor, you're pretty cute for a dead guy, and you obviously care about her. You can't even hurt people, and I don't think you would if you had the chip taken out. Heck, if I liked you in that way in the least, I'd go for you".  
  
Spike said, "Thanks pet. Buffy has issues though. Angel, the poof I was tellin' you about? He pretty much set her views on vampires. Soul, good, no soul, evil".  
  
Kat regarded him seriously and said, "You should go back. Solve your issues. You can't run away forever, you know". Spike laughed dryly and said, "Vampire, pet. Forever is nothing to me". ------------------------------------------------ Buffy walked into the Magic Box. Since Spike had left, she had been getting more and more depressed. Not only had she lost a patrolling partner, but Spike was the only one who could even remotely understand what she was going through. He always listened.  
  
Willow had been found on a magic high one night, and now she was recuperating and trying to stay away from magic.  
  
Everyone, it had turned out, had gotten some sort of farewell letter. Except for her. Willow had gotten a letter wishing her luck with her magic and hopefully a reunion with Tara.  
  
Tara had gotten a letter telling her how much Spike respected her and how he hoped she could work things out with Willow.  
  
Xander had gotten a letter telling him that although Spike hated him and the feeling was mutual, he wished him luck with his marriage.  
  
Anya got money for the Berber root he had stolen, with wishes from Spike for much money and happiness for her. Everyone could see how Buffy was reacting, but they didn't want to push the issue, so they said nothing. Clem had moved into the crypt under a request from Spike.  
  
Life was moving on, and Buffy just couldn't figure out where she fit anymore. And now she couldn't turn to Spike for help. 


	3. A Year Later

I don't own BtVs, Joss Whedon and Mutant Enemy do.  
  
A Year Later  
  
It was hard to believe it, thought Spike. It had been almost an entire year since he left Sunnyhell. He was ready to go back now. He'd had lots of fun, he and Kat had left New Orleans and traveled to New York, and he'd shown her around, but now he was ready to go and face the Scoobies.  
  
He was in L.A. right now, doing everything in his power to avoid the poof. Kat had come with him. He'd asked her to, he liked her. They were best friends. Now they were three days away from going back to the gang.  
  
Of course, they wouldn't be expecting the changes in him. No one would. This will be bloody interesting, he thought as he stepped into the sunlight and on to the street. ---------------------------------------- Buffy was at home alone watching T.V. I'm so pathetic, she thought. She could've been out with her friends, but no, she had to say she was tired.  
  
She was doing better, she got a new job as a self-defense teacher. Dawn was doing good in school, and Willow and Tara were back together. The Nerds were in jail and not getting out.  
  
Xander and Anya. Oy. Xander had decided that he wasn't ready and had run away a few days before the wedding. Anya hadn't been seen since. Xander had come back a few weeks after he left, but never said anything about the incident.  
  
And Spike. He wasn't back. Buffy missed him so badly it hurt. She knew, instinctively, that the past year would've been a hell of a lot easier if he had stayed. She had needed-and still needed-backup on patrol. The vamp population was increasing rapidly without him helping to keep it under control. And of course, there was the small fact that Buffy felt something for him.  
  
She hadn't realized it until a few months after he left. She felt something strong for Spike, soul or no soul. She wanted him back, only now it was too late. ---------------------------------------------- Spike crashed into the 'Welcome to Sunnydale' sign. He grinned at the crunching noise and Kat rolled her eyes at his satisfied expression.  
  
"Home sweet home", said Spike.  
  
They reached the crypt and Clem gladly gave it up. It was too easily accessed by demons for his taste.  
  
"So what are you going to do first?", asked Kat. "Promised the Bit I'd see her. She's first. I guess I'll meet her at school", said Spike. "But for now, sleep is good". ------------------------------------------- The next day Dawn was with her friends. She was going to walk home, she was used to it by now. She unconsciously played with the key. She did that a lot. It was a habit she'd picked up.  
  
Janice gaped and whispered excitedly, "You guys, don't move too fast, but check out the total hottie on the sidewalk!". The girls turned around and each agreed with Janice.  
  
Kristin, who Dawn couldn't stand, said, "Mmm. Looks cute. Wonder what he's doing here. Maybe I'll go find out".  
  
Dawn was standing with her back to the sidewalk, so she was the last to turn around, and when she did she gasped.  
  
Spike. In sunlight. Wearing a grey long-sleeved shirt and blue jeans.  
  
Spike looked up at her and smiled. Dawn ran down the stairs of the school and into his open arms. "Spike! You're back!", she said happily. Then she whispered, "Wait! Why aren't you all dusty?". He whispered, "Long story, Bit. Tell you later, in private. Here come your pals".  
  
Indeed the girls had followed Dawn down. "Dawn, aren't you going to introduce us?", asked Kristin sweetly. "Um, yeah, you guys, this is Spike, he's a friend of my sister's. He's been gone for awhile, that's why I was so surprised to see him. Spike, these are my friends, Janice, Ashley, and-"  
  
"Kristin", she interrupted. "Nice to meet you", she drawled. Spike was uncomfortable and said, "Uh, yeah, same here. Dawn, you about ready to go?". She nodded and waved goodbye to her friends.  
  
"I don't like that Kristin girl", said Spike. "Me neither. So what's up? Why are you back? How come you're in the sun and not dust?", asked Dawn.  
  
He led her to the crypt and after they got inside, hugged her for a long time. "I missed you a lot, Bit". Then he said, "As for what happened, I saved a witch from some demon, and she gave me a second Ring of Amara. Apparently it's even stronger than the first one. Been this way for a couple months. But Bit, ", he hesitated, "The chip-it's gone now. But I haven't fed".  
  
Dawn looked at him and said, "I trust you". He smiled, relieved, and continued. And I finally found something to put in my chest. You still got the key?". She nodded. "Never took it off". He smiled. He took out the chest and she opened it.  
  
He took out a picture. Dawn looked at it and saw Spike grinning at a girl with long brown hair and green eyes. She was drenched and glaring at him. She looked to Spike for an explanation, hoping that this wasn't some new love of his. Buffy wouldn't be able to take it.  
  
Spike said, "This is one of my best friends. Met her in New Orleans. She knows about vampires, she's a psychic. Her name is Kat. We're like family. She came back here with me, she's renting an apartment. I'm going to split it with her". He looked at Dawn for approval. Dawn smiled and said, "I'm glad you made a new friend".  
  
He grinned back and gently placed the picture inside the chest and took the diary out. "Got some catching up to do", he explained. She nodded. "Hey, Bit. I'm planning to make an entrance tomorrow. Ya mind not telling anyone that I'm back yet? Oh, and did anything interesting happen while I was gone?". Dawn filled him in.  
  
"Damn. Never thought I'd see the day where I felt sorry for the Whelp. I'll come by the Magic Box with Kat tomorrow. I think we'll patrol tonight. I f I run into Buffy, I'll just deal with it. Need my spot o' violence, after all". Dawn left, extremely happy. Now, if only tomorrow would come. ------------------------------------------- The night saw two black leather clad figures strolling through the graveyard. "Now, remind me again why I listened to you and bought this coat?", asked Kat. Spike grinned and said, "If you want to be seen with a Big Bad around Sunnyhell, leather is a must".  
  
Kat smirked and said innocently, "Big Bad? Where? All I see is a love- whipped, big fluffy haired, softy of a vampire". Spike growled playfully and said, "Oi, wench! Mind what you say! And my hair is NOT fluffy!"  
  
Kat laughed and said, "I apologize, oh mighty William the Bloody. Please don't gum me to death, Grandpa". That did it. Spike chased her around until Kat tripped and let out a whimper.  
  
Spike was by her side in an instant. "Kat? You alright?". She tried standing up, but to no avail. "I think it's a sprain. A bad sprain, but I'll be alright in a few days". He helped her up and slung his arm around her.  
  
"See", she said, still smiling. "A big softy". Spike growled at her again and said, "I might just decide to drop you if you keep that up". She smiled and said, "No you wouldn't". He huffed and kept going. ------------------------------------------- Buffy walked through the cemetery. Okay, so it was his cemetery. She sighed. Who was she kidding? She patrolled here almost every night, after she was done with the usual places.  
  
She stopped dead in her tracks when she saw a flash of bleach blonde. Could he really be back? She hid behind the tree and watched. It was him. He was back. But he wasn't alone.  
  
She watched as he walked and laughed with his arm around some girl. A very pretty girl. A vamp jumped in, a fledgling. Spike got his game face on and dusted it. The girl didn't even blink as he came back and put his arm around her once more. They walked on.  
  
Buffy looked on. Spike found someone else? He didn't love her anymore? The thought consumed her brain. She had thought that his love would be something that never changed. Suddenly patrolling didn't seem like such a good idea anymore.  
  
She quickly did a 180 and walked swiftly away. ------------------------------------------ The next day was a Saturday, so that morning the Scoobies hung out at the Magic Box, which Anya had apparently left to Tara.  
  
The door of the Magic Box swung open suddenly, and in strolled...  
  
Anya. (Thought it was gonna be Spike, didn't ya?). Xander's face went pale and he gulped. Everyone else just stayed in place.  
  
She looked a little different, she'd cut her hair and she was wearing designer clothes. She also had her pendant on. Buffy saw this and jumped up. "You're a vengeance demon again". It was a statement, not a question.  
  
She spoke for the first time and said, "Yes, I am. Don't worry about it, Buffy. I don't kill people. And all my punishments are all temporary". She turned to Tara and let out a ghost of a smile. "Tara, I'm glad you took good care of the shop. Thanks". She seemed a lot more subdued, not the greedy capitalist they had all known.  
  
"So what's up Anya? Why are you back?", asked Dawn, who honestly liked the demon and respected her. Anya smiled wearily and said, "Prophecy. Thought that you should know".  
  
Buffy groaned. "I hate prophecies. What's it say?". Anya reached in her bag and brought out a dusty and ancient looking scroll. "This is the Scroll of the End of Days". She started to read.  
  
"The Chosen shall die her second death and live for the third time. All will not be complete in her. She will seek the Dark, in the wrong way, and it shall leave, only to return when it sees fit, with a weakness lost and two strengths gained. One of the strengths had been lost and found again, the other is new. The Second Strength teaches the Dark. They shall be inseparable, and the Chosen shall be misguided. The Chosen and the Dark shall have a second confrontation, the same issue as before. The consequences may be dire if the Chosen cannot accept the Dark. If all goes well, there will be a reunion. The Chosen and the Dark will not be pleased, but the Second Strength shall help them overcome. She shall guide them both. But then the Second Strength will receive either gift or a curse, depending on whether or not she chooses to accept it. The creature will rise from the Mouth of Hell, and all will need to resolve their issues and beat the enemy, who they have faced before, but it will not be quite the same". She finished.  
  
Everyone stared. "Well", Buffy said, "At least I'm not gonna die". That broke the tension a little, until a girl came walking into the Magic Box.  
  
Dawn recognized her as the girl from the photograph, Spike's friend. Buffy recognized her as the girl Spike was with last night. Ugh. What is that skanky bitch doing here?. Then she instantly reprimanded herself. She didn't even know the girl. But that didn't mean she had to like her.  
  
Kat calmly walked to the shelf with a shimmery green pendant on it. She picked it up and also added a couple of candles. She knew that they were staring at her, but hey, the store was open, so she was in the clear.  
  
The girl must be Dawn. She wasn't glaring, at least. Guess she recognized her. The vengeance demon...Anya? She and the guy-Xander-were looking at her curiously. The two Wiccans were wrapped up in each other. But the Slayer...damn, what got her so riled up? She was practically shooting daggers into her back.  
  
Buffy thought angrily, She's probably picking up the candles for Spike...ugh, I don't even want to think about this!.  
  
Kat smirked as she added some incense to her pile of things. She had picked up on that thought. While Spike was incredibly hot, and undeniably appealing, she had already found the love of her life. She sobered at that thought, then berated herself for thinking of him. She shook her head and walked over to the group.  
  
She turned to Tara with a smile on her face and asked politely, "Excuse me miss, but would you happen to know where the raven feathers would be?". Tara pointed to the shelf in the back.  
  
She picked up a feather and Tara got up to ring up the items, then Anya asked her suddenly, "What are you doing with an Amulet of Kytayn?".  
  
Kat finished paying for her things and turned around. "I'm a psychic, Anya. Oh and Buffy, not sure what I did to deserve the wrath of the Slayer, but just so you know, I'm not evil. See you guys tonight". She strode out the door.  
  
Everyone stared at the door. "Anya", asked Buffy, "What is that Amulet for? And please say it doesn't bring forth the end of the world or something". Actually, that wouldn't be so bad, cause then I'd have an excuse to kill her.  
  
"No". Anya was in awe. "The Amulet of Kytayn is a seeing tool for psychics. It helps them boost their powers and clarify their visions, but only very powerful ones can even activate it". "Um, I know who she is", confessed Dawn. "What?", asked Buffy. "Yeah", Dawn said sheepishly. "She's a friend of Spike's. He told me about her...yesterday". "What?", said Xander. "Fang Face is back? And he hasn't come around yet?".  
  
Dawn looked at him and said, "Chill out, Xander. Spike is my friend, so don't insult him, please?". Xander scowled, but he didn't say anything. Buffy looked at her sister. Spike had seen Dawn-probably found her-and he hadn't gone to see her?  
  
She sighed and said, "Dawn, we'll deal with this later. We have the prophecy to worry about now". They spent the rest of the afternoon trying to figure it out. Buffy, however, had no desire to fill in the blanks about the 'Dark'. It was Spike, of course.  
  
And speak of the devil. Spike strode in, the girl in tow. "Hello, all. Except for the Whelp, of course, nice to see you again".  
  
Willow and Tara got up and gave him hugs. Willow liked Spike, she thought he'd changed a lot. And Tara liked him too. He was easy to talk to and he was always honest.  
  
Anya gave him a hug too. Dawn waved at him, and even Xander had a hint of a smile. Buffy didn't do anything.  
  
She didn't feel like friendly conversation at the moment, so she said icily, "What are you doing back?". He looked hurt for a split second, then masked it under an expression of indifference. "Well, this is the closest thing I have to a home, whether you like it or not. Plus, I promised the Bit I'd be back. So here I am".  
  
"With a new slut too. What a surprise", she spat. He was in front of her face before she could blink. "I took a lot of crap from you last year Slayer. Not anymore. Talk about Kat like that again and I don't know whether I'll be able to control myself. Things have changed".  
  
Kat laid a hand on his arm and said, "Relax. You didn't come here for a fight, and I really don't want to have to hold you guys apart like children".  
  
Xander had thought for a moment and said, "Like you can even back up your threat, Captain Peroxide. You're neutered, remembered?".  
  
Spike smirked at this and said, "Not quite. Chip's out. You see, I'm on a different leash now".  
  
Before anyone could react, he held up his hand.  
  
"The Second Ring of Amara. More powerful than the first, which Peaches smashed. Impervious to sunlight, crosses, etcetera, etcetera, but if I bite someone it can sense it and it stops working. Bloody thing has a mind of its own, and it's fused to my being. Meaning, it won't come off until I'm dust. But it isn't opposed to violence. Meaning, I can hit you when you annoy me, Whelp. Which is basically all the time, but I won't start 'cause knowing that I could beat you into a bloody pulp is good enough for me".  
  
Now everyone stood, shocked. Buffy said coldly, "So remind me what would stop me from staking you right now? You can still cut someone and drink from them". Spike looked at her, but before he could say anything Anya spoke up.  
  
"Grasping for straws much, Buffy? He hasn't killed or ingested human blood for a long time, like since he got the chip. I can't smell it. I smell the demon blood, of course, which means that he's kept on killing demons. There is no ill-will radiating from him, except a little to Xander, which I can definitely understand, and that was always there. So calm down".  
  
Spike smiled at Anya and said thanks. Then he looked at Buffy and said, "I think being able to walk in sunlight and not being able to be staked is a hell of a lot more appealing than killing people. What, you think I did it to impress you or something? Sorry, not playing that game anymore".  
  
Buffy was hurt by that, but she refused to let on that she was wounded. And part of her knew that she deserved it.  
  
Before they could start arguing, Kat said, "Spike, we've gotta get to the apartment interview".  
  
Spike grabbed her wrist and looked at her watch. "Bloody hell! We've gotta go. Nibblet, I'll stop by tomorrow, around 8, what say you?". She nodded.  
  
He continued. "Oh, and Kat says you've got a new prophecy. I'll give Tara my new address if we get the apartment, in case you need help, before you say anything Whelp, we are not together, she is my best friend, Bit will explain it, see you later". He was out the door in a flash.  
  
Kat waited a moment and said, "I know what the prophecy means, but I can only tell you bits and pieces. Would you like me to patrol with you tomorrow? We can talk". Buffy nodded, albeit reluctantly.  
  
A muffled yell of "Kat! Get the bleedin' hell out here!", was heard. She laughed and said, "The first vamp I've ever met who was concerned about punctuality. See you tomorrow". She walked off. 


	4. Explanations

I don't own BtVS, Joss Whedon and Mutant Enemy Inc. do.  
  
Explanations  
  
Buffy looked herself over in the mirror. Okay. I look fine. I'm not dressed up just because Spike's coming over. I'm not. Ok, who am I trying to kid? I'm dressed up because I want to impress Spike. The world has now officially been turned upside down.  
  
The doorbell rang and she jumped. Since when did Spike ring the doorbell? She shook her head and went down the stairs, where Dawn was already letting them in.  
  
Spike took a moment to appreciate Buffy's beauty. She looked wonderful, red halter, black jeans, and her hair loose and long, just the way he liked it. He shook himself out of those thoughts. If something was going to happen, it would have to be of her own doing, not his. He wasn't going to push.  
  
He gave Buffy a ghost of a smile before excusing himself and Dawn to kitchen. Kat looked at her and said, "Ready?", she nodded.  
  
Walking through the graveyard, Kat didn't waste time. "You thought I was with Spike, didn't you?". Buffy nodded sheepishly. Kat smiled and said, "Nope. No way. We're like family. He's like my older annoying brother. I met him in New Orleans, and we hit it off. We've sort of gotten used to being roommates, so we decided to stick with it. Cheaper that way, too. And I'm assuming you saw us yesterday? He was holding me up. I tripped and sprained my ankle". She lifted the leg of her jeans up and Buffy could see the bandage around her ankle.  
  
Buffy nodded. She said, "Sorry about calling you a slut. It's just that-". "You were jealous because it looked like we had a thing and you like Spike. In the I-want-to-kiss-him sort of way".  
  
Buffy denied it vehemently. "No. No way. Not having happy feelings for Spike. Nope, no way". Kat smirked and said, "Please. All the vibes coming off your body say 'Bring me Spike'. It's just the Slayer in you that's getting in the way". Buffy looked at her and said, "How would you know? You don't even know me". She didn't say it angrily, just curiously.  
  
Kat responded, "The way Spike talks about you sometimes, I'm surprised I don't know you better than you know yourself. Actually, I think I might. But don't get huffy. He was just venting. Nothing personal". Buffy nodded.  
  
"So", she said hopefully, "He still loves me?". Kat sighed and said, "Truthfully? I think he might. Probably. He doesn't give up easily. But I do know that he isn't going to make a move. You have to decide whether you want him or not. But I think that he'll honestly be okay either way, otherwise he wouldn't have come back and risked rejection". Buffy took a moment to let it sink in. Spike might love her still. She had to decide. He didn't need her, but he might want her. He wasn't afraid of rejection, and he wasn't going to make the first move. All this equaled the fact that Spike might be ready to move on. Which she should want, but she didn't.  
  
Kat saw the look on her face and said, "You should make your decision soon. He's the type that wants all or nothing, at least in the end".  
  
Buffy nodded, and changed the subject. "So what do you know about the prophecy?".  
  
Kat replied, "Well, Spike is the 'Dark', obviously, and I suppose I would be the 'Second Strength'. The part of the prophecy that says 'The Chosen shall die her second death and live for the third time. All will not be complete in her. She will seek the Dark, in the wrong way, and it shall leave, only to return when it sees fit, with a weakness lost and two strengths gained. One of the strengths had been lost and found again, the other is new. The Second Strength teaches the Dark. They shall be inseparable, and the Chosen shall be misguided', has already come true. You died, came back, didn't feel alive, went to Spike, he got fed up and left, he chose to return now, he got the chip out, he has the Ring of Amara, and he has me as a friend. I taught Spike about how to accept himself for what he is. We are practically inseparable, and you thought we were together when we weren't".  
  
Buffy nodded and said, "That makes sense". They stopped for a moment, both sensing something coming closer.  
  
A good 7 vampires descended suddenly, and they were fighting. Kat quickly projected three stakes, and they hurtled through the air, hitting their marks. Buffy was a blur of action. She quickly staked another three and went for the rest.  
  
Soon they only had one vampire left. He smirked and said, "My lady wanted me to tell you that she'll have what's hers soon enough. Whether you give it to her or she takes it by force". He pulled out a stake and dusted himself.  
  
Kat and Buffy looked at each other. "His lady?", said Buffy. Kat frowned and said, "That message was intended for you...so someone wants something you have. The only question is, what is it?".  
  
Buffy replied, "Whatever it is, it can probably be used for evil, so they aren't going to get it. We'll just have to be on guard". Kat nodded and they continued an otherwise boring patrol.  
  
When they got back to the house they told Dawn and Spike what had happened, but they didn't have any ideas either.  
  
Spike suddenly jerked and he braced himself on the table. He came up full vamp-face, but his eyes were flashing between blue and gold. Buffy pulled Dawn away and sent her upstairs, and backed away from him. Kat, on the other hand, went straight up to him and rubbed his back. The demon face receded and Spike collapsed onto the couch, panting heavily.  
  
"Bloody hell! Now I know who's in town", he said wearily. He got up and closed his eyes, concentrating. Then they snapped open and he glared into nothingness.  
  
"What is it?", asked Buffy. "Drusilla", he hissed. "The bitch is using our sire-childe bond to call me". Buffy was frozen solid. She'd always had an intense dislike of the crazy vampiress.  
  
Kat said, "Guess she wants you to come out and play. She probably sired those fledglings we took out. She wants you back".  
  
"Are you...going to go?", asked Buffy, who honestly expected him to. He'd spent over a century loving Drusilla, and now that she wanted him back, wouldn't he go? But Spike surprised her by saying, "She's going to have to try a hell of a lot harder if she thinks I'm going after that".  
  
He sat back down again and said, "She abandoned me. Just like Angelus. I should hate her. But I can't. But I'm not going back to her so she can use me again".  
  
Kat sat next to him and started rubbing his back again. He relaxed and put his head on her shoulder as she rocked back and forth. Buffy was admittedly envious of the way Kat could calm Spike down with just a few gestures when he was upset, while she had known him for a longer time and jumped away thinking that he was going to start killing. How could Kat trust him? She obviously knew what he was and what he'd done.  
  
She shook her head . This wasn't the time for those thoughts. "Well, Drusilla isn't invited into any of our houses, and she'll probably be holed up in either the factory or the mansion".  
  
Spike looked at her and said, "The mansion. She'll be at the mansion". "How do you know?", asked Kat.  
  
Spike gritted his teeth and said, "I didn't spend a 100 years with her and learn nothing. She'll be there. All the happy memories of Daddy dearest, the damned poof".  
  
Kat instantly shut up, knowing how much Spike hated Angelus, but Buffy had to say it. "What do you have against Angel anyways?". Spike looked at her, and said, "What do I have against him?". "Yeah, tell me. Seems to me that the only thing you have against him is that he was better than you", said Buffy.  
  
She knew it wasn't just because she had loved Angel. There was other stuff there too. And she genuinely wanted to know, although she hadn't meant to be so mean.  
  
Spike thought about it for only a moment before rising to the challenge. If the bint thought that was why he hated Angelus, she needed a life lesson, now.  
  
He looked at Kat and said, "I'll do better than telling, you I'll show you. Kat? You up for it?". She nodded. "What?", asked Buffy. Kat said, "I'm a psychic, remember? I can transfer his memories of Angelus to you, it's safe, I've done it before. But only if you think you can handle it".  
  
Buffy squared her shoulders and looked Kat in the eyes. "I'll do it", she said.  
  
They sat in a triangle on the floor. They linked hands and Kat spoke. "Spike, think of Angelus. Call up your memories, and try not to squeeze our hands off". Kat started glowing a soft blue.  
  
Buffy felt blackness, and then she was...in London? It was London, she could see Big Ben from the room she was in. What the hell was she doing in London? She looked down at her hands, only to see familiar rough hands instead of her French-manicured ones. Holy shit. She was in Spike's body. Ok...Remember, Buffy, mind link thing. These are Spike's memories, it would make sense that you saw them from his point of view. But it doesn't make it any less creepy.  
  
She then noticed an extremely pissed off Angelus. Not Angel, but a non-soul- having Angelus. She flinched in her pseudo body as he drained people in front of her. A little boy, a middle-aged woman and man, and a girl no older than Dawn. She didn't understand why this was important, but then she saw her 'hands' struggling against chains.  
  
Spike was trying to save these people. Why? Then she felt a jolt of love and pain and guilt from Spike. These people were his...family. Spike's family. Angelus had killed Spike's family in front of him, and he had been helpless to stop it.  
  
As soon as she realized this, the scenery went black and then Spike appeared before her. He said, "I didn't kill my family for the 'group initiation'. Dru ratted me out, Angelus chained me up and killed them".  
  
The scene then faded into a bedroom. She was looking at Spike instead of being him, which was much less disconcerting, thankfully. But what she saw was extremely disturbing. There was Spike, bloodied, beaten, and naked as an equally naked Angelus stood over him with a knife and whip. It was sort of obvious what had been done.  
  
Once again, it all faded to black, and Spike was narrating once more. He cocked his head in that way of his and said, "Would you believe me if I told you that this was a weekly or even daily occurrence? But I loved him still. He taught me how to be a vampire, to hunt, to kill. And then he left. Abandoned me and left me to take care of Drusilla for over a century. And then I saw him again, the first time we fought, at the school".  
  
The scenery faded into the school now, and she saw Spike talking to the Angel she knew, who was pretending to offer Xander to him. Spike saw through it and yelled at Angel. She should've found the speech humorous, at least the part about Angel being Spike's 'Yoda', but she could feel the fresh anger and feeling of abandonment running through him, and all of a sudden she didn't find his impromptu speech so funny.  
  
Spike appeared again and said, "And then he lost his soul. Came back like nothing had happened and Dru instantly fell to her knees like a begging puppy. He mocked me when I was in the wheelchair and stole her away from me again".  
  
The scene was brief, but it enough to make Buffy want to retch. Angelus and Drusilla. Together. Spike had rolled in and stopped short at the sight, then instantly turned and wheeled away. Then there was a flash of a memory of Valentine's Day. Drusilla was seriously whacked out if she gave up that necklace for a heart, Buffy decided. It was disturbing to see Spike so...romantic, and sweet. But she knew that's how he'd be if she gave him a shot.  
  
Thinking about it, she supposed that she did have a lot in common with Spike, more than she had realized. They were both warriors, fighting was in their blood now. They were...equals, in a way. And they had both been love's bitch for a long time. Falling in love only to have that love scorn them or, in Buffy's case, leave them. And that was partly why she was afraid of opening up to Spike. She could grudgingly admit that Spike had never left, except for when she drove him to it. And even then he always came back.  
  
As she opened her eyes to see her own living room, she saw Spike still had his eyes closed tightly, and Kat was rubbing his back again. He was letting something out between a purr and a whimper and a growl. She made her decision and made her way over to them. Kat didn't even blink, just whispered, "Rub his back in circles, it'll work faster". She nodded and gingerly placed her hand on his back.  
  
Spike felt the Slayer place her hand on his back. What the bleedin' hell is she doing? 5 minutes ago she was all snarky and now she's rubbing my back?. He decided just to let her. She could explain herself later. He let himself lean into her, and soon the growling and whimpering stopped and he was purring deeply. 


End file.
